Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Measuring the Value of a Relationship

Here are a few thoughts on relationship for you to think about today:

You can measure the value that you place on a relationship by the level of discomfort and awkwardness you are willing to engage to make that relationship the best it can possibly be.

The absence of tension and conflict is not the mark of a healthy relationship any more than the absence of heavy breathing and muscle fatigue is the mark of an effective exercise program.

The most fulfilling and productive relationships in my life all have one thing in common: I have initiated or endured very difficult conversations and adjustments along the way to make the relationship what it is. And the relationship is what it is-not
in spite of the hard things-but because of the hard things.

Jesus modeled this well with Peter...
  • When he asked him not once, not twice...but, three times: “Do you love me?” Needed to do some tough confronting and pushing for Peter to lead the charge at Pentecost.
  • Then, in Matthew 16 it is even more wierd when Jesus tells Peter "get thee behind me satan!" Huh?
Look, I would seriously call into question any relationship that you consider "close" if it does not hit some awkward and uncomfortable moments. Also, I think there is a big difference between a "close" relationship and a "transformational" relationship.

Do you value the key relationships in your life enough to engage extreme discomfort to keep correct alignment and focus?

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