Wednesday, April 8, 2009

Some Parenting Thoughts

I only have 27 months of experience on my parenting "resume", but can I make a few observations this morning? These are some of the things that Tricia and I have been discussing and learning together as we learn to lead Davis.
  1. We all know that people say "kids need you to be consistent." Let me just say this...PEOPLE are right. Consistency works. The less we waiver, the less he waivers.
  2. Hollow threats are ineffective, but oh so popular!!! "If you don't stop, I will _____!" "If you do that one more time, I am going to _______." If what you said is true....and you will do what you said, then use that approach. If you are not going to get up off your butt and do it, then it is better to keep quiet. Hollow threats are broken promises. No one respects promise breakers. Not even a 2 year old.
  3. Eyes, voice and tone (out of relationship) are almost always a far better discipline tool than belts, spoons and hands (out of reaction). Nothing would please me more than for Davis to respond to my look or my words so that I never have to escalate my discipline response beyond that. (Keep dreaming, huh?)
  4. Praise the good things way more than you correct the bad ones! If you have that flip flopped, you are not looking for the good stuff, but watching for the bad. It is your bad programming, not your kids bad behavior.
A few less deep things that we are doing that seem to be working so far:
  • Sing together as a family. May feel cheesy, but it is worth it! They are kids! (We sing "Jesus Loves Me" on the reg.)
  • Explain things that they probably don't get. They may get some of it now and some of it later. But they gotta get it somehow. Don't wait til they are ready...whatever that means.
  • Make big deals out of small things. We went crazy over all the different shells yesterday. As if we had never seen one. Remember, they haven't.
  • Free toys are the best toys. Davis will find 2 small rocks (too big to swallow) that he likes and play with them for 3 days. Then a stick. Then a leaf. Then repeat. That is stewardship at work in a 2 year old!! LOL!
Could say more, but will sign off.

What do you think of these ideas? You seen any of them at work? Do you have other things to throw into the conversation? Leave a comment. I would love to hear from you.


KevinS said...

Kids spell love T-I-M-E. Tell them you love them often, but if they don't get your time, they won't believe it. Little kids won't understand why, they'll just know that something else it more important to daddy (or mommy) than they are, if you spend more time there than with them.

Just my $0.02 worth.

Anonymous said...

Nice one, I learnt one or two.
But how do one deal with very inquisitive kids, our 'lil girl can bombard one at times with questions, it can be tiring at times if you know what I mean.